is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
My hand turned me down
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
