Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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