I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
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