For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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