At least make sure they are 18
Why
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
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