why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize