Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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