When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
