I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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