Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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