Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
