Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
