Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
