If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
