he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
