Its about making memories worth repressing
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize