OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
