its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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