Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
