he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Just high enough for therapy.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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