haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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