Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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