I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I think we might need a safe word for this...
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
