just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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