Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
