Please, let me fuck your mom
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
