Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize