Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Randomize
