She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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