Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
My penis needs a shock collar
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
