Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize