i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize