My hand turned me down
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
