I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
