i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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