did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
