What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
