Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I pour the whiskey from now on
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I think I just shit out all my problems.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
