The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
