it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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