That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
