I heard we made out
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize