It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
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