u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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