Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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