took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
