YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
