spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
