i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize
