that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize