So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
